December 20th, 2014 1:23am we went communication black out. Like couples who stay away from one another days before a wedding to really revel in the anticipation. More than anything our distance not talking didn't give me any time to freak out and shut down...he didn't have the option to bail without the option to say he wasn't coming.
I can see that now though at the time all I could think and see was bumblebees.
Bumblebees is how Nic quickly helped me to re-percieve my anxiety.
Rowan's first laugh broke through the sound waves today. Nic and I were laughing so hard we were both crying. Today was my first day back at work and the. struggle. was. real. It's almost like I forgot how to run my business. Definitely out of practice on being my own boss. I had no idea what the hell I was doing all day. I sat down at my desk all official like but then opened Facebook to aimlessly stare. Wrote a very short brain dump and then less than 5 minutes after the whole thing began Ro woke up.