Hi. 
Welcome to my happy hippie misadventures of self discovery in artistry, marriage and motherhood merrily carrying the baggage of mental health and an autoimmune disease. I promise to keep things interesting and almost always look damn good while doing it. BTW my baby ruins lives and you'll hate me for my husband. 
Namaste.
luv/Te' 

Laboring, Alien Jizz and Waiting- 38weeks6days

Laboring, Alien Jizz and Waiting- 38weeks6days

This morning I went pee, wiped and my hand came back covered in alien jizz.  

Mucus plug. What a disgusting wordage but so accurate. That didn’t happen last time thus I handled it accordingly, yelled and made Shayna come view the thing so I wasn’t alone in the scene from Stranger Things. 

On Tuesday evening I was dilated to a three and then Shayna swept my membranes. Thursday at 12:30am and who knows what’s happening. I’m contracting but nothing consistently, at least I don’t think. Because my pain is so high already I’m having to just notice in my breathing and physically feeling for tightness on my belly. 

Right now there’s one happening. 

Nic is snoring next to me. This whole thing is oddly calming.  

12:34am when I look up. Sequences saying just keep single stepping. I hope Alethea can make it. I’m going to focus on visualization once in done writing. Clearly seeing my mom and her drumming. Rowan interacting closely.

Shayna pointed out that’s probably what baby is waiting for, his big brothers grounding energy. 

Tomorrow I get to hold my first born baby. 

Hes been away for 17 days.  

I’m so ready for my full family and to become four instead of three. I can’t wait to breathe Rowan in and feel his little hands all over me. 

18hrs is killing me. 

I hope baby boy will wait so I can hold him before the shifting.  

Full Moon happened tonight and I didn’t ritualize or do anything fancy, made apple muffins from my grandmas recipe, hung out with Kate and laughed hysterically with Shayna watch Grace and Frankie. The day ended perfectly. 

Another day with the opportunity to feel him move inside me. On that, I’m meditating.  

The Most Pregnant - 38weeks2days & Feeling Guilty

The Most Pregnant - 38weeks2days & Feeling Guilty